Just Listen to Yourself

How often do you listen to what you’re saying? When you speak to others in conversation or instruction, do you take note of your tone of voice or the way you are talking to the other person? Often we are so busy trying to convey our own message that we don’t think about what we are saying and how we are saying whatever it is. I wonder if you would want to be talked to in the way you talk to others? Perhaps that’s a good place to start in this self-examination.

Would You Talk to Yourself Like That?
In Ephesians 4:31-32, the Apostle Paul says, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Think about each of those words for a moment. Bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander and malice. We would not want to be on the receiving end of comments or actions featuring those attributes. So, in the same way we ought to be careful to avoid speaking to others in that way. It will take intentionally listening to our words if change is going to come.

We are, though, supposed to fill our language with kindness, tenderheartedness, and forgiveness. Those are words we long to hear. Those are the tones we need to hear. When someone speaks to us in these ways, we are usually listening closely. Words spoken to us in kindness and tenderheartedness express love, concern and care. The earsplitting words previously mentioned express no love, only harshness. Who wants to be rubbed by words that are as coarse as sand paper? Not me. And probably not you either.

How Would Christ Speak?
There’s more to this story though. Paul says that we should treat one another this way because Christ treats us this way. To the disobedient and rebellious Christ offers forgiveness. To the wayward and down trodden He offers mercy and kindness. To the broken and hurting He offers tenderheartedness. We should express this love to one another because we have received it from Christ. I wonder if you have received it. Your words can only reflect His love when you have received it. If you have received the love and forgiveness of Jesus Christ, I wonder if you are extending it to others through your conversation. It will take paying attention. Are you listening to what you’re saying?

Generous Love

Would you consider yourself a loving person? Do you think others view you as loving? The Apostle Paul says that if we are followers of Christ we will follow His pattern of becoming poor for the sake of others. This state of intentional poverty is to be a display of love. Let's think about what it means.

Sometimes our poverty is expressed in humility as we are right in a situation and are called to respond to others in gentleness and kindness rather than pride and self-righteousness. We can show this loving poverty by serving others. Most often it is messy when we serve someone. Whether they are an elderly person needing physical assistance, an addict going through the pain of walking away from a substance or a person suffering the agony of divorce. Caring for people drives us to our knees and should give us a real sense of our spiritual poverty. And by that I mean our poverty is our great need for Christ, His strength and His help. In reality, we have nothing without Him.

There are times, though, when this poverty is financial. These are the times that Christians are to sacrifice to give money to help the poor, other Christians or those affected by disaster. Read this verse from 2 Corinthians 8:8-15 to hear Paul’s thoughts,

I say this not as a command, but to prove by the earnestness of others that your love also is genuine. 9 For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you by his poverty might become rich. 10 And in this matter I give my judgment: this benefits you, who a year ago started not only to do this work but also to desire to do it. 11 So now finish doing it as well, so that your readiness in desiring it may be matched by your completing it out of what you have. 12 For if the readiness is there, it is acceptable according to what a person has, not according to what he does not have. 13 For I do not mean that others should be eased and you burdened, but that as a matter of fairness 14 your abundance at the present time should supply their need, so that their abundance may supply your need, that there may be fairness. 15 As it is written, “Whoever gathered much had nothing left over, and whoever gathered little had no lack.”

An interesting phrase in those verses is found in verse 14. Paul says that, “your abundance at the present time should supply their need, so that their abundance may supply your need, that there may be fairness.” In the economy of the Kingdom of God, we are always looking to help one another. It is not a welfare state where the rich stay rich forever and the poor stay poor forever. As we live within the Kingdom of God here on Earth we know that there will be an ebb and flow of times of abundance and times of need. Paul says that we should give when we are in a season of abundance and trust that we will receive in our time of need. The fairness is not that we all make the same income at all times. The fairness is that we are willing to share with those who are in need. We know that Paul calls Christians to work hard, so there is no precedent for anyone to be a persistent mooch. Yet, there are genuine times when people are and will be in need. Christians show their love by sharing the resources God has given them whatever those resources may be.

Now, do you consider yourself a loving person? Do you have room to love others more? May your love be proven by your generosity…in whatever form it may flow.