Thursday, August 20, 2009

A Hypocrite's Confession

I lost it. I really did. Fortunately, it isn’t my mind I’m talking about, but my temper. I was faced with some choices in dealing with a difficult situation and I chose poorly. I was guilty of letting my pride get the best of me and a great display of anger was unleashed. To add to it, the storm had rumbled early in the day and I was left to watch the replay in my mind over and over all day long. After watching for a few hours, my anger turned to hurt and frustration that I had blown it once again.

It's not the end of the story, though. There is hope. God did not turn away. In fact, He used the remainder of the day to teach me about this early morning conniption.

First, I was set to talk with a man about a struggle he has having. What might this struggle be? That’s right, anger. I’m having lunch to talk about this man's anger and all I could think of was mine. Ever been there? Needless to say as I listened to the biblical wisdom I was giving him, I wondered if I would heed my own words.

After I survived the lunch of conviction salad, I returned to the computer to finish some work. The phone rings and it’s another friend seeking some advice in a different counseling situation. As our conversation rolls on he says, “Isn’t it funny how God uses the things we tell other people in counseling to deal with our own problems?” No, it’s not. At least that’s what I wanted say. By this time I was really starting to get the point. God had seen my little display earlier in the day and was now at work correcting me. There were no lightning bolts or voices from Heaven, just nudges throughout the day to get my attention. He got it.

You’ll be happy to know that I did return to the scene of the crime. I did seek and receive forgiveness. And, I did leave with a desire to learn and grow from the experience.

But I also left wondering how often God weaves people and conversations through our day so that we will ultimately think of Him. Do we truly realize that God is at work all around us? Have you taken notice of how active He is in your world?


Anonymous said...

Well said.

Mike Fagan Jr. said...

Great read Brandon! I too am guilty, probably more than I like to admit, of giving advice I need to heed rather than hand out. Part of the human condition however is being flawed, and I think that as long as you realize that you did a hypocritical act and adjust accordingly, you can mark it up as hard lesson learned, coming out feeling positive about it. The important thing to remember though is that it is more important to learn from it than it is to come out feeling ok. A little conviction never hurt anyone.